02 August 2005

Why They Keep Losing.

Clueless and barking about it. Here's a howler from the DNC:

To: National Desk, Education and Political reporter

Contact: Josh Earnest of the Democratic National Committee; 202-863-8148

WASHINGTON, Aug. 1 /U.S. Newswire/The following is a fact sheet released today by the Democratic National Committee:

The White House this weekend announced that President Bush received good news during his annual physical. Doctors pronounced the President to be in "superior" physical condition, which media reports attributed to his rigorous, six day a week exercise routine. While President Bush has made physical fitness a personal priority, his cuts to education funding have forced schools to roll back physical education classes and his Administration's efforts to undermine Title IX sports programs have threatened thousands of women's college sports programs.
Nice logic dummy. Do you expect me to believe Bush is in good physical health because there's some Department of Education budgetary line item that makes staff and facilities available to him six out of every seven days? Bush is in shape because he gets out of the chair and Just Does It.
"President Bush's has dropped the ball when it comes to fully funding physical education in public schools and women's athletic programs at the college level," said Democratic National Committee spokesman Josh Earnest. "His personal habits indicate that physical fitness is not just fun and games for him. Don't our kids deserve the same opportunities to be physically fit? President Bush should stop running from his responsibility and make sure that all American children have access to physical fitness programs."
Clearly Bush is preventing all children from running aroung the neighborhood, or riding their bikes. Bush's failure to provide soft carpets to all Americans mean that no child can possibly do push-ups or sit-ups. Also, since the Republicans now control everything, and no child has any access to music or devices that play music, how are youth supposed to do any calisthenics, aerobics, pilates, yoga, etc.
Doctors gave President Bush a clean bill of health in his annual checkup this weekend and White House spokesperson Dana Perino proclaimed him to be "in superior health." However, America's youth are not so lucky. While obesity has been declared an epidemic in this country, Bush's education policy is putting children at risk with cuts in physical education and school athletic programs.
If only Bush would stop funding the programs that force Fritos and Mountain Dew onto children. If only he'd grant travel permits to parents so that they may travel to grocery stores, where quality food is available, often 24 hours a day.
The Bush Administration's Education Department quietly issued a new clarification of the regulations interpreting Title IX. The new rules allow colleges to demonstrate that they are satisfying the demand for women's sports with an online survey showing that female students have no unmet sports interests. Even if the non-response rate is high in the survey, non-response is to be interpreted as a lack of interest according to the Education Department.
So there's no web access on college campuses? Uh-huh, riiiiiight . . . Furthermore, everyone knows that without NCAA sports programs, there is not one single opportunity for casual or organized athletic activity for any college student. How arrogant to suggest that people actually attempt to organize their own softball league, Frisbee golf event, or (gasp!) swim meet.
The Rate Of Childhood Obesity Has Skyrocketed In Recent Years. The rate of childhood obesity has skyrocketed in recent years, and more than 9 million children over age 6 are now considered overweight. The rapid rise has alarmed public health experts, because overweight children are far more likely to develop health problems. Currently, the U.S. government estimates that 30 percent of the nation's kids are overweight or on their way to being too heavy.
Again, Bush's fault: Manditory TV watching (part of the Patriot Act), outdoor activities forbidden, and free donuts from Haliburton for everyone under 12 all contribute to this.

Hey you DNC/Dean/Moonbats, grow some policy. Pitch some ideas. Propose an agenda. Drum up some legislation. Conjure an original thought. Your unique combination of hollow rhetoric, false hysteria and overall insanity are sinking your ship, and your presumption . . . no, your outright demand that the nation be enslaved by what trickles to it from the federal government is insulting.

All your bleats about GITMO and whether the butterscotch ice cream is naturally flavored. Or the weeping over Ashcroft, and how he forced Blockbuster to fax a list of all your rentals straight to Langley. Rove, Rove, Rove,; he's so white, male, and clever. It's all about the straw-man scandals because you haven't got anything else to talk about.

You DNC types are always the ones who claim Bush is stupid and incapable of doing the job. At least make him have to work at it to see if you're right.

UPDATE: Powerline is runnning on the same tracks.

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